Blog Entry: 15 Lens Flair and Lack of Care.
October 2022-December 2022
"What matters to lorry drivers? Murdering prostitutes? Fuel economy?", "This is a hard job [driving a lorry] and I'm not just saying this to win favour with lorry drivers: change gear; change gear; change gear; check your mirrors; murder a prostitute … " November 2008 statement made by Jeremy Clarkson.
This was my first education into truckers, I was early 20s when I watched the November 2008 episode with this in it. Clarkson’s books were the only books I had ever completed by choice at the time, not to mention by this time Top Gear had gained notoriety and was its own religion in most UK households. So as always there is context coming! I started the month of October physically dragging Jess out of bed at 3 AM. Sam (The Crab) was up, had text me, and we needed to leave soon to make sure we would get to the truck stop while it was still dark ……..as I said; context! Now, you would have expected me to be more weary of truckers after my teaching from Clarkson, but this was emphatically the correct location for the shoot. So, for the record, no illegal substances were to be purchased or would be consumed on this trip, nor would anyone be getting an early end to their life, and (for certain friends reading this), no musical car partners games were to be played either.
We were going out to an abandoned truck stop between Banff and Cochrane to do a photo session with The Crab and my wife. The particular truck stop in question, looked like it was a ‘nuke’ dealing location from ‘Delta City’ (watched Robo cop the other night). It was a broken down mostly gutted building that was covered in spray can wall art graffiti, messages of love and the occasional phallic symbol along with limited safety and no working toilets. Couple this with my newly purchased LED light panels and it was going to be an awesome shoot! Jess and The Crab were very excited till they got there and realised how damn creepy it was in the dark, so after me doubling as the photographic version of Batman and checking we had no left over drug needles, murderers, or pervert lingering and assuring we wouldn’t encounter any unwanted visitors, we started shooting. And once into the flow everyone chilled the fuck out and started to relax.
I never once looked at my watch! The whole shoot flashed by (no pun intended) and that’s the thing, waking at 3 AM, traveling 40 minutes, unpacking and setting up lots of gear and not to mention trying to work with a space that I hadn’t properly seen before with lighting I was still getting to grips with. This should have been stressful, but I loved every minute of it. I enjoy the challenge; I like pushing to improve! But the idea of waking up at 7 AM for a day starting 8 AM and finishing at 4.30 PM at a normal J.O.B, well that shit destroys me inside. I normally wake up 4/4.30 AM and spend the time between then and 7 AM studying for flying, editing, writing music or finding ways to move the business forward/lean something helpful and then all the motivation is killed when it hits 7 AM and I need to get ready to leave for said J.O.B. Their a saying “hard times bread strong people and strong people create successful times” let’s hope this is true.
In the fall of 2020, Jess and I were painfully running out of options. Even after a year of trying, no garage would give me a position or sponsor our move thanks to the world shutting due to the ‘C’ word, my commercial airline flight licence was considered ‘on-fucking-job-training’ and we were both denied PR based on the fact we hadn’t gone to uni. It was at this time we realised one of us would have to undertake a form of schooling if we wanted to go any time in the near future, and as I had already been accepted to challenge my red seal along with all techs getting good wages, the decision was made it should be Jess. Jess’s reaction, “I’m not smart enough!” an unfathomable stupid self-assessment by my beautiful wife and this was even before she knew she would need to pass a maths entry exam………. yep she really wished she had been good at maths in school. The funny part is, not for one second did I think it was too much for her, not once. Don’t get me wrong, it was a fight and a half to install motivation and belief in her and that’s without paying for a teenage looking geek to bring her to the level required in a record two months. My confidence was spot on, she did get accepted, and then went on to achieve in the top 1% and gain an induction into a Sorority, ultimately finishing 8 months early!! Oh and secure a job as a bookkeeper before even finishing school 8 months early!!!
So here I sit in a huge hall with Brooks, The Crab, and Jane (Paul from Dodge’s wife) waiting for my wife to walk across a stage and receive an official congratulations and diploma in Business Administration with a Management Major, one of very few that have a sorority gold tassel. I still don’t think she understands how proud of her I am. Me and Jess have spanned 15 years (around half her life) and when I first meet her, she had very low confidence and had been encouraged to marry into money and be a stay home wife………. Even at the time I could see she was capable of so much more and over the years she has come to realise this too! I think she was always a career woman, she just didn’t know it, and now she does, I don’t see her backing till she achieves a level most people physically couldn’t.
It’s hard, I just have a mind that is always just looking ahead, trying to fix the next problem. Some will say “well that’s good” but its double edged! Rarely do I spend time to appreciate all the achievements that have been made and enjoy the success, even for just the most fleeting moment. I think everyone is guilty of one or the other. Either smelling the roses to much or not recognising how good the smell as they are just focusing on planting more. So as this was big achievement, we went out for food along with 12 others! And our three friend groups got to meet, and about two hours in, Brooks is giving me this very confused look, the same one the Spanish barman gives you when you’re in Shagaluf and do not make a single fucking effort to learn the language. Instead, you just yell English retardedly slowly with an insulting mockery of an accent, accompanied by random hand gestures …… Brooks look of confusion was due to Andy and I going full aggressive chicken Essex on him. It’s like cockney rhyming slang, but with more fucks, cunts, and random noises thrown in. Don’t worry, I can say this, the rule seems to be you can piss-take at your own culture……just not other peoples? The only conversation that contained more profanity that week was the one I had with amazon……
In England I had purchased many photography items with Amazon, for that matter Amazon were my main store, as of September 2022 that ended. I will now only use Amazon in very rare circumstances if ever again. I took the plunge and purchased 2 lenses a 2.8 70-200 NIKKOR and a 5.6 200-500 Nikkor. Neither are ‘cheap’ lenses! So, you can only imagine my anger when I have the 200-500 turn up in a brown box with the Nikon box in it and all the accessories loose around it, zero-fucking-padding and three different tapes from previous times it has been opened. I knew at this point someone had been in this lens before at the minimum, I wouldn’t be surprised if it was second hand. All was confirmed when I opened the main Nikon box to find a + $2000 lens wrapped in deflated air bag packing like you would wrap carrots when picking them up from the local allotment, and free to wobble and move around like a prick in a bucket! The actual cardboard sleeve Nikon make to hold this with sniper precision was partially missing or jammed in the bottom of the box leaving the packaging as tight as a wizard’s fucking sleeve, along with the lens cap, loose, upside down! Yes, completely leaving the lens open to damage, dust and as I would easily confirm scratches. You would expect this to be rectified ASAP, but no and what I had not mentioned was, they messed up the delivery times and then left it with an elderly neighbour and put it had been delivered to my address. With no delivery notes. It would take over a month to receive a refund, even though the item was with them four days later. This circle jerk has ended with me only and exclusively using The Camara Store in Calgary from this point onwards!
The positive is I have made a line in the sand; I will now make all and every effort to shop locally or from independent stores. And I feel much better for it. The beginning of November I had found some Presonus monitor speakers on Amazon, found I could get them from Long and McQuade in Calgary. Needed chargers and extensions for the studio, went to my local Canadian Tire. Needed sound equipment for my Rega, went to the Audio Room in Calgary. Needed extra storage, went to Computer Tree (a local privately owned store). And so on. This also had me thinking, I’m a customer who has spent thousands with Amazon over 10+ years, but they treat me badly once and I’m done! Trust takes years to build and can be lost in seconds. This is something I am constantly aware of, friends, or business it’s the same trust is so important.
“Daniel, if you have a Capitals sign, I will make you walk home! You’re wearing one of my Flames jerseys whether you like it or not.” This was the message I received from Batman Cade. The arsehole in me just can’t help but wind him up lol. He had invited me to my first Calgary Flames game, and this was the response I got when I told him I had made Capitals signs for both of us. It was a phenomenal night! Flames won! I got to experience The Saddle Dome; the food was good! The banter was on point, just slowly ticking off the tourist items I have not done yet.
Early December hit and it was out! My piece I had written for The Home magazine had been published, this is cool as previously stated I never thought my dyslexic arse would have something published. Night-time was coming earlier every day and we were feeling the drop in Vitamin D. The bookstore put on a Christmas concert that was a good night out and we were doing movie themed nights at home. Work (my J.O.B, not the photograph company) was destroying my soul and social life thanks to the shit hours and constant weekends, from week one of starting I had done every weekend and would until January!
The demanding Miss Nugget enjoyed her second Christmas, it was small again as we are still trying to get everything under control and sorted, we elected for the second year to not have Christmas day at home, this is becoming a Canadian tradition! Instead, we went with all the Eurotrash crew to an Indian for Christmas dinner! We did Secret Santa and as there was no baked Christmas pudding, so we all got baked instead. I never did the whole ‘living away in my mid twenties’ thing nor did I go to university so never celebrated holidays with friends instead of family. It felt like an episode of the TV show Friends, an adopted family of friend, together because of circumstance.
I took some holiday over Christmas; this was my first proper braek in months. Time to reflect is important, seeing the wood from the trees. By the end I had refocused on what needed to be sorted PR, flying, the company, and getting out of the eat, sleep, repeat life.
Next time, we will begin in a packed hot spring, I briefly scratch my band itch, and Jess, The Crab, Brooks, and I witness a man towing a boat in -40, we see man with a plastic face and Batman Cade convinces me to abandon being cool and become a twitcher. Until next time TTFN.
